Book Review - Emotional Blackmail

Emotional Blackmail by Susan Forward

This really has to be one of the most important books I have ever read.. so I guess I never felt I could say enough to justify its importance.. but I have to start some place.. it's part of my everyday life now that am sure its affects will come through in other posts..

Emotional blackmail is a huge business, everyone does it to an extent, and everyone at some point falls prey to it..

This book is all about recognising when you are in the blackmailers grasp, and how to react and change your own behaviour toward the blackmailer so you do not become a 'victim' of it.. and its only small changes you need to make, changing a couple of words in a response can turn around a potential destructive conversation, and being consistent in those changes can completely turn around a damaging relationship.

Personally this book has helped me see when people around me have been emotionally blackmailing me, realising the anger, stress, and especially guilt I felt, was actually due to being blackmailed, when I began to see that, and realise it, I could then basically, 'let myself off the hook'.. just recognising it for what it is, is a huge step into breaking free from its affects.

Don't get me wrong, I still feel all that stuff.. you tell me I'm an awful person because I don't do this or that for you, then yeah, I will feel like crap... but now I can take a step back, see the blackmailing, see my own feelings toward it and respond in another way to how I would usually respond.

My new way of responding actually has at times strengthened me massively, to the point it increased my self esteem and confidence when the other person was hell bent on destroying that,..... of course I was delighted in the irony of the outcome.

The book has also helped me to see where I may be emotionally blackmailing other people and curb my behaviours that way.. because I really do not like being emotionally blackmailed, for any reason, so I would not want to do that to someone I care about.

This is a fantastic life changing book... if you are feeling you are being emotionally blackmailed. then I absolutely recommend reading this book... it will change your life.